January 13, 2005
In My Good Phase
Have been working for the past couple of days so I haven't had much chance to write. Also have been having problems with my appliances in the house! No, they haven't been talking to me or anything schizo-like but they have just all been messing up at one time. Just when I can't afford to just go replace them. I guess that's how it always happens.
Work has been going wonderfully. I feel like my dark cloud has lifted a little. That's how my disease does. It goes for periods of bad and good. My paranoia never goes away but I am less likely to react to it when I am going through a good period. I realize I still need to seek medical attention as soon as I am financially able because when it all goes downhill again I put myself and others at serious risk. When I am in my fog I don't realize how bad it is and I just want to fall off the face of the earth. I just hope and pray that I die while in this. I can't control my thoughts or emotions.
Don't want to write too much because I have a lot to do before work tommorow and need to get started. If I take it slow I can make it so I am not so overwhelmed.
Posted by Stephanie on January 13, 2005 03:51 PM