Health Diaries > Dissociative Identity Disorder > Butterfly Team
March 28, 2006
confusion inside....
it's almost 3:00am. i slept for about 2 hours but had some weird dreams and now can't go back to sleep. there's a lot of talk and images going on inside right now but it's all mixed up and i'm confused. i keep seeing some images of D's house and some things that happened there. the body is older than kristy, who is three. in these images, i'm maybe 7 or 8, can't really tell but definitely older than 3. i can't tell who it is though. it's not samantha because her association with D is that he rescues her from the cult stuff so she doesn't hold any memories of him hurting her. i keep hearing the name ava. and i keep seeing some images of the ten year old. she never gave us a name so i am wondering if the ten year old is now letting us know that her name is ava and she is somehow involved. but the very few memories i have of the ten year old i thought had to do with my brother. but i guess it's possible that she could be involved in both situations. i'm not sure. it's all mixed up right now. just keep seeing all these new images and hearing this new name - ava. i guess it's also possibly true that ava could be a whole new alter. i don't know. i can't fall asleep again because there's so much going on in my head. I'm also hearing his voice - D's voice. i'm hearing the most disgusting things and i can't stand it. it's so creepy. it just keeps repeating over and over in my head. i feel so scared.
Posted by Butterflyteam on March 28, 2006 11:51 PM
I'm still praying for you, Butterfly. You are worthy of love. Don't forget that.
Posted by: Amanda at March 29, 2006 11:19 AM
hugs
Posted by: flutterby at March 29, 2006 4:31 PM
