Health Diaries > Dissociative Identity Disorder > Butterfly Team

October 17, 2004

unbearably overwhelmed......

I can't get everything done. The amount of paperwork that I have to do for school is completely overwhelming me. I have progress reports due tomorrow for 30 kids and I haven't started them. I still have a huge pile of papers to grade before I can even do the progress reports. I still have to do my plan book, write two letters to parents, write up an evaluation for a child and plan out a unit on the election that I need to start this Wednesday. It's 9:40 on Sunday night. It all has to be done by tomorrow morning. I just can't focus enough to get it done.

I've been feeling so sad and lonely and abandoned. I just want to be able to curl up on Donna's couch and have her hold me. I want to pretend that the rest of the world and all my responsibilities don't exist. A bunch of the littles are so close. I can't switch now. I can't. I have too much to do. That has been the problem all weekend. I haven't been present much of the time and nothing I had to do for school got done.

I feel so overwhelmed. I can't do this anymore. It seems like the teacher doesn't show up unless the children in my class are there. She is never around at night or on weekends so that I can get work done. So I am left to do all this work but I can't focus. I can't handle all this school stuff right now. Not with everyone else inside feeling the way they are. I don't know what to do.

My head hurts so much. I just want to go to bed and hide. I'm never going to get it all done. I don't know what to do.

Posted by Butterflyteam on October 17, 2004 9:45 PM