Health Diaries > Dissociative Identity Disorder > Butterfly Team
September 05, 2004
self injury........
I want to cut so badly right now. There are several reasons why. I want to just hurt myself. I feel like I deserve to be hurt....punished....for being bad. I'm pretty sure these are the thoughts of someone inside....possibly Stephanie. I feel like my insides are overflowing with hurt, pain, sadness.....and that if I cut myself, I can release at least a little of it. I also want to cut to show people how much I am hurting on the inside. When you go to work each day and you are responsible and you take care of what needs to be done and you socialize with coworkers and friends.......people don't see the terrible pain you are in on the inside. My insides are absolutely aching right now.......just TREMENDOUS pain, fear, sadness, lonliness, desperation. Why doesn't anyone see this? Why doesn't anyone help me? i need help. I want to cut myself....cut every inch of my body. I want people to see the cuts and hear the cuts screaming "Now can you see the pain I am in!!!!!!!!"
Posted by Butterflyteam on September 5, 2004 11:38 PM
