August 13, 2005

I've been faithful to the Energy Medicine treatment I began in December 2004. I really expected to be finished with this treatment many months ago. Actually I expectd to be cured by now. I think even the project leader expected it to be over many months ago. We must be a tough group. Or…this is a tough illness. It is not only the one bacterial infection that needs to be beaten but also many opportunistic bacteria that are only happy to invade a weakened body. Just ask an HIV patient. Not to be put in with the same seriousness as HIV. Wait…yeah, come to think of it, it is as serious.

Recently our energy group leader cut us off without any notice. He said that he decided to give us a week without the energy broadcasts and see how we do. I really don’t feel much different. He told us that we have had some reversal of benefit. I am feeling annoyed and wanting to quit, but if this is doing me any good at all – then I want to continue. The only good Lyme bug is a dead one. My energy medicine leader says – “still plenty bugs to go”; “only about half way there”. Halfway where? Is he asking me to believe that in another 8 months I will be cured? I’m too demoralized for that.

Recently, my doctor gave me a homeopathic treatment, which lasted a month. One little vial of strong alcohol tasting stuff I drank every three days. I didn’t feel much during the time I was taking it. It seems to be another faith-based treatment. I believe it helped to some degree. I have believed in it all. The list of failures is impressive. Such a long, long dismal journey.

Posted by Laureen at 2:42 PM

May 23, 2005

Time does fly. It has been 3 months since my last entry. It was my intention to stay on course with this current treatment and give you some sort of progress report. But I can tell you that this is a marathon - not a sprint. I wrote the following letter to my energy group.

Musings of a Mad Woman:

An interesting comment my doctor made during my visit with him on Friday: I was mentioning about having so many pathogens and so much die-off and daily herxing. He said that we probably have more pathogens in our bodies than we have "ourselves" in our bodies. I can see that it will take a long time for our body's immune systems to recover enough to kill off (no matter what path of treatment we follow) a majority of the pathogens that make us the sickest and therefore to begin to feel better. Our immune system wages a continuous battle - and our immune systems have been completely overrun and have to pull themselves up out of the muck of pathogens and continue fighting. So it ends up being a continuous battle followed by a continuous dumping of toxic garbage. It also seems to me that after only 5 months of energy transmissions, that it is most unlikely that we would even feel a little better. Most likely that we would feel horrible. And so on perhaps for a long time! i.e.: Improved Immune Systems = Killing pathogens = Dumping of toxins = Feeling crappy = Progress :).

So that is the jist of my entry this date, 5/23/05, I'm still hanging in there, trying to get the most I can from the methods I am using (samento and energy and non-toxic living) and having a long long way to go.

I appreciate your strength and your support for me during this long long lonesome road.

Posted by Laureen at 8:21 PM | Comments (3)

February 16, 2005

It was in September 1999, before my first crashes. I heard of a woman who was a “Medical Intuitive”. She could read the aura surrounding your body and tell you what was wrong with you. I made an appointment with her for a private reading. She told me that there was nothing seriously wrong, all I needed was “a little tune-up”. I continued to get sicker until finally I couldn’t get out of bed. My opinion was that she had gotten it wrong – there was something very seriously wrong with me.

Then about a year ago I read about a woman located on the east coast who could tune musical instruments without touching them. The writer of the article said that this woman could tune instruments even long distance and that the owner of the instrument (the writer in this case) even benefited physically from the tuning. I still have that article and have never called her. I felt embarrassed to call her without an instrument to tune.

My third brush with energy medicine was about 3 years ago, when I was very sick. My husband drove me to Calistoga. The twenty-seven mile distance was brutal for me to tolerate. I visited with a practitioner who treated me energetically. She muscle tested me to find the initial insult to my health. It was an early memory of an argument between my mother and my father when I was very young and still in a crib. She treated me with flower essences. I found that for a few weeks, I had vivid long intricate dreams. I wrote them in my health notebook. I had a second visit with her, in which she found that my third chakra was wide open and energy was pouring out. She closed it for me.

I liked her and her “flower child” type of treatment, but I was running out of money and the trip was so difficult and so long and sadly, I didn’t go back.

Recently, I enrolled in an energy medicine research project. I signed a confidentiality contract. So with some previous good experiences and some not-so-good experiences, I again put my faith in connecting with the energies of the Universe.

Posted by Laureen at 5:16 PM