Going to try again
Well, maybe the 8th time will be the charm....
I'm going to try going to a new therapist tomorrow...again.
On a whim, I asked some friends for a recommendation and they gave me her name. She is an expert on DID and trauma who's been working with DID for over 20 years. So I e-mailed her, and she said she can see me tomorrow. Its a 45 minute drive. But, maybe it'll be worth it. I can't really afford it, but, maybe if I just went once in a while. We'll see. If she's good, maybe we'll go back. I'm trying really hard to be brave. Mae is having a really hard time with it. Last night she just cried and cried once we got in bed and said that no one asked for HER opinion--she only wants Sharon. Of course I only want Sharon too...but I also want someone to help me get over Sharon and what she did. I want someone to help all of us get over the trauma that Sharon caused by leaving us so suddenly and screwing up our mind so badly. I am scared but I also just really hope this works out. And part of me thinks I must be so dumb to put myself in this position of vulnerability yet again.
BTW, someone made a comment about me "acting" mentally ill and how come I don't get fired at work. I do not act mentally ill. Nor AM I mentally ill. I just happen to have DID. I am a completely functioning person and I happen to be a fantastic teacher, a fantastic nanny, and I'm really good at ANY job I have held over the years. We have different alters for different jobs. No other alters usually come out at work. Its not like in the classroom we'd be switching personalities and acting like a child or crying or breaking down. On the job we are normal adults. If you don't know me, which you don't, don't accuse me of acting a certain way. Thanks.
As far as using "we" and "I" and "us" and "me" sometimes, there are times when I/we write that there is more than 1 person present.. Sometimes 2 of us are here at once writing and we'll write We/us. Sometims just 1 person is here and I'll write I/me. Its called co-consciousness. And THATS not mentall illness either.
DID is a highly creative way of coping. People with DID are usually highly creative and highly intelligent with a lot of gifts.
For more info in general, see abuseconsultants.com as another resource.
Posted by pilgrim | Filed under:
