Uncertainty and Progress
I got word this morning that some major changes are going to be happening with my job. Even just a few months ago, this news would have devastated me and sent me into a tailspin for days. I probably would have spent the entire day crying, worrying, and rushing around trying to figure out what to do--because its big news with a great deal of uncertainty and no answers. However amazingly enough, because I've had this time alone to learn to trust God and know that He has a good plan for my life and that I can count on Him, I handle the news this morning much better. Not that I was happy to get my news by any means. Its something I would have rather not heard. But instead, when I heard what is in store for me for my job next school year, I thought, "Well God, I guess you know what you're doing," and I started getting curious as to how God is going to work all this out. Knowing that those who hope in Him will never be disappointed or put to shame, and knowing that God has a good plan for my life, I'm sure that something will work out. And I know that I can trust God. So I think this is going to be an interesting time. I am afraid of these major changes that are going to be taking places, but I know that I can trust that things are going to work out. I'm also a little disappointed, and I'm not happy with change... but I can trust God to take care of me. I feel like I might be making some progess inside my head. For today. This moment.
Now after all that deep stuff, I made another goal because I finally have a bathing suit that I have been wanting to wear since about 1987. There was this one style of bathing suit that was in style back then which all the "popular" (read:thin) girls wore, which was a 1 piece that had the sides cut out that showed off how skinny they were. Back then I was too overweight to be able to wear one. Over the years I would try one on, but I was always still too hourglass-shaped to be able to look good in one. Well I found one in the girl's section at Target the other day and tried it on and for the 1st time ever, I actually look good in it. So I finally have one. Yah, I know, don't lecture me on how I shouldn't be able to fit into a girls swimsuit at my age. So, there's my totally shallow goal after all that deep stuff I posted at the beginning.
Posted by pilgrim | Filed under:
You sound GREAT today! Good job on how you are handling the news about work. And even so-called "shallow" things can make you feel better sometimes, so "yay" for you and an achieved goal!!
Hi
I am not a christian and don't believe in God but I share your optimism about your future now that you can trust in it being there for you.
Hope you're doing a little dance in front of the mirror to celebrate your new swimsuit too!
Anna
I'm also so glad that you're feeling so positive about everything, in the midst of all these CRAZY changes. (damn idiots). I've seen and heard so many changes in you in the past few weeks. I'm so glad and praise God for it everytime I think of it. You're doing really really good.
P.S: You're still too skinny though. ;-)
each and every success makes the next day that much easier.
excellent job.