Yours, Mine, and Ours...
Has anyone seen the new, updated version of the old Henry Fonda/ Lucille Ball classic yet? I saw it this week with my husband, and thought it was really good. It has created a real dilemma in my mind, though...
In the movie, the mother has 10 children and a very laid-back parenting style. Home is a place for free expression, messiness, and lots of love. The father is an admiral with 8 children who runs a tight ship, very orderly. The fun part of the movie is when the 2 families join together and try to get along.
Inside of my mind, we have this problem ALL the time. Especially when it comes to taking care of the inside kids. It carries over into my job as well, where I take care of children. There are some of us who are extremely laid back, such as Carolineine and a few kids. Carolineine is into everyone being themselves, showing their feelings, expressing themselves opening (who cares if it makes a mess? messes can be cleaned up!)There are some of us who are extremely anal retentive. Missy is into running a tight ship and has a few inside kids like her. She would be great in the military. Missy loves having everything neat, in rows, on a schedule, having charts to follow, using neatly typed lists, and expects children to only speak when spoken to. She believes in spanking children and that parents rule the roost. You don't question rules. You just do what you're told to with a quick "Yes, sir!" As for myself, its hard for me to know what is right. If someone tells me what to do, I want to know WHY first. I want to understand why they're being bossy, why they want me to do something, and then I'll think about it, decide if its something I really want to do. I can never figure out anything else. My teaching style depends on who is out front that day. Usually, its Carolineine who teaches, so the children in my class have the consistency of a calm, loving teacher who sets clear limits on their behavior and talks things out. Its the adults who have to deal with Missy, who rants about things being messy and out of order and how she has to fix everything. Then there's me, who is just trying to figure out who did what last, and trying to catch up on what's been going on.
Sometimes I wish I could have just ONE opinion on something. I wish I could pick just ONE thing and stick with it, and not feel like such a revolving door. Inside of me, everyone wants and likes and hates such different things, its impossible to keep up. Just shopping for some shampoo can take half and hour. If I ever were to become a parent, the discussion on how to BE a parent would probably take YEARS.
Posted by pilgrim | Filed under:
Not that my comment is particular to what you just wrote above but after having a HUGE fight with my therapist, I somehow happened upon your "site". You actually gave us some answers. You seem very paralled to us, as we are DID also.
Eight kids... I do not think I would cope well with that.