Stressed out but trying hard
I am so going crazy here. But I'm trying to work on recovery stuff. Its so overwhelming and taking so much hard work. And I know the work is going to get even harder to do as I delve deeper into things I know I need to face. Dang. I am so stressed out. I'm trying to handle this all on my own and I dont have very much support right now but am working on getting more. People are too busy or just having they're own problems going on so I need to keep on looking elsewhere for help. I am looking into the outpatient program at the hospital I was just in and also into a couple programs run by the mental health organization for my county. I need to do SOMETHING, because me being home alone all day is REALLY not a good idea. Need more structure than this "hang out alone all day and work on recovery whenever I can force jo off the couch" thing. I really wish I had and need someone to talk to every day. Or at least on a more often than twice a week basis. I need friends around. I need a mentor or something. Instead of always being the leader and always the teacher, I need someone who can help ME for a change and help me know what to do. i get so tired of always being the one who's supposed to be so independent and always knows what to do. sometimes i am just so clueless, like now in my life.
Posted by pilgrim | Filed under: