Getting things finalized

Spent the day on the phone with insurance and hospital business people, intake people, and I dont even know who else. Getting transferred from one line to another to another. And sometimes from one idiot to another, but in general the people have been kind and trying to help.

The hospital needs payment up front.
(Of course.)
But at least we found out they are in network. Thank God.
Paying my co-pay on my own, and the parts that my insurance wont pay, its going to completely tap me out. Completely. I got paid at work yesterday... might as well put the hospital's name on it.

Trying to think of this as "an investment in my future" and "an opportunity."

I am so stressed out that my body is vibrating.
I'm exhausted.

The 5 year old got to talk to my therapist tonight. I tried to talk for a while, then I got so overwhelmed and exhausted that I started crying, so embarassed because Idontwanttobethisway and iwantthemtogoaway and Ihatethemandthisissoshameful.
I can't imagine going into the assessment next week and telling a stranger, "Oh, by the way, I have other people living in my head... I hear voices.... i can't keep track of time...etc." :( Its so embarassing.
But at least the 5 year old got to talk to my therapist, and it seems like she feels a little better, and at least reassured that the hospital we're going to isn't filled with bad people. My therapist explained things to her in a way that must have made sense.

Posted by pilgrim | Filed under: