a dream about a bus
I'm doing beter. This has been a hectic few days--- someone inside, a little one, has been working hard on trying to figure something out. I'm not sure exactly what, but I know it had to do with real and pretend, and imagination. Its been weighing down on her, not in a bad way, but something on her mind. Whatever it was, she seems to have been resolved a bit more. Yesterday I finally got back to feeling like myself, dissociating less, and actually got some things done. I'm getting ready to go back to work (school starts in a week)-- that gives me a goal to work toward.
I'm trying so hard to get control over things. Be in control of myself, of my life.
Last night I had a dream that I a bus went by my house with no driver in it. It was filled with people-- especially children. Everything was chaotic in there, and they needed a driver. I had no choice but to get on the bus and try to drive it.
The thing was, I never drove a bus before. Sure, I thought, I can drive, but a bus is big, and awkward, and takes up a lot more space on the road, and I dont know if i can drive a bus.
In my dream I was sitting halfway back on the bus (the steering wheel was about 6 seats back) and I was trying to drive. The kids were all yelling, adults were getting in the way. Some were giving me advice on how to drive the bus. I tried sitting in different places on the bus to drive, in the back and in the middle and on the top, but nothing was working, not with everyone getting up and running around on the bus and shouting and being in the way.
The bus was going all over the road, and I was getting exhausted.
We finally stopped at a school in my dream. I got off the bus and took a breather. Thankfully, someone else, the real bus driver, was on there when I got back. Turns out I was just supposed to be a STUDENT on the bus, NOT the driver! Thank God! The driver was someone who actually KNEW what to do.
i am trying to figure out what I can learn from my dream. it feels that somehow it applies to my life.It makes sense that things on the bus (my mind) won't go the right direction until everyone starts calming down and working together) and wouldn't it be nice if i was not supposed to be the driver of this bus?
Posted by pilgrim | Filed under: Biofeedback